Well I think I'll be joining the myspace community soon. This online journal stuff is just so addictive. Anyhow I got that job at Hot Topic. I may be selling my soul but eh I make $$, get a scholarship, and a reeeeeally sweet discount for my family and I (which will really be put to use when my younger siblings do their school clothes shopping for the fall.) I started training Friday and will have my first work day this coming Friday.
I also passed math and did well in all my classes. I have a 3.5ish which I am really hoping to boost to around a 3.7 or 3.8. 3 studios next semester but it should be fun.
Also, two major guy mishaps within a 72 hour period. I usually do pretty badly in that area but this is a record for me. Amazing that I can get myself into such horrible situations even though I don't put out. Anyhow first mishap is completely over and eh if I see the guy again it doesn't really matter. Second mishap I really didn't do anything wrong. I still like the guy, and I'm still trying to decide what to do with him. Right now I could strangle him but I think I'll wait to hear his side of the story first. Then I'll strangle him. I guess I didn't know what I was getting myself into with him. If he can handle the situation, though, I think he deserves a chance. Grr enough of that I guess.
I was finally able to download Limewire now that I'm back home. It must have been more than 2 years since I've had a downloading program. I do kind of feel guilty about it but I don't use it much- and when I do I usually end up buying the cd/record anyway. I think downloading programs are only really a threat to bad musicians. I mean, if I liked top 40 radio, I'd definitely download the music rather than buy it because the music is really not worth what it is priced.
I think the last cd I bought was Murder City Devils' "Empty Bottles, Broken Hearts" . It was $11 or $12 and definitely well worth it. I first heard of the band when I was 12 or 13, and started downloading their music shortly after. I lost track of them during my street punk/oi phase, but got back into them a few years ago. I remembered how much they had intrigued me, so when I was old enough to work and actually had some pocket $$ and therefore could seriously expand my music collection, Murder City was definitely high on my list. So by downloading their music I wasn't ripping off the band, but rather becoming a fan who was/is willing to shell out $ for their music and merchandise.
I guess what it comes down to is that you can't produce something weak and generic and then expect people to pay a lot for it when they can get it for free. It makes more sense to make decent music, sell records for a reasonable price, and develop a loyal fan base. That way people will want to buy the music, and possibly even want to come to concerts and buy merchandise. It's kind of like just being honest and reasonable.
I know this isn't really a problem with the music I listen to but if I am one of the unfortunate few who gets into legal trouble for downloading I will not be very happy. Unlikely, of course, but damn if that happens I'd be especially mad because I'm somewhat of a scrupulous downloader. Wow that was along rant- but it's been on my mind since I downloaded Limewire. Maybe I can rest easier with that off of my chest.
So I'm going to try to visit some of my high school teachers this week- should be interesting. I'll save that for another post though.

I really need to study for a math exam right now so of course I'm scanning and posting pictures that have no relevance to what I've been talking about in my journal thus far.
This is a mural my friends and I painted in our old high school (West Seneca West Senior- my condolences to former and present students). This was our last project for AP art- it took us about a month to finish. I'm not really sure where the idea came from but its basically a big scary dragon trying to eat a parade float dragon which is being held down by baby skeletons. I'm still not sure what the point was but hey it looks pretty cool. I painted the parade float dragon and skeletons, Brittany painted the dragon, and Ryan did the sky, grass, and I think the rock too.

















Ok now its really time for me to study!!!!!!!

In celebration of my figuring out how to post pictures on here, as well a figuring out how to use my scanner, here's some skeletons.



I am presently listening to Demented Are Go. I am very impressed- I highly recommend checking them out. These journal things are addictive. I think I should stop for now.

Ok I think I figured how to resize this. This is me before my spetum piercing, when I just had my nostril done.
Yay it worked. As soon as I have pictures of my septum piercing I'll post those. You know if you submit pictures of you modifications to bmezine.com you can get a free temporary membership which gives you access to certain parts of the site that aren't open to the public. So that's what I'm doing once I get pictures.

My septum's still swollen. It should be back to normal by now but I guess having a cold/sinus infection or whatever this is will slow down healing. Anyhow the swelling has gone down enough so that the jewelry doesn't look crooked anymore. Perhaps I won't have to tape it to my face to train it into the right spot.
Grrrrrrrr I'm missing Dead to Fall right now. I missed them in September when they were with the A.K.A.'s, who I also have yet to see. My friends went to that show, and apparently it wasn't that great. This show at Broadway Joes, which is a very small venue, so I think it is probably an excellent show because there's really no opportunity for everyone to be wallflowers (which I guess is what happened at the last show- no one really moved or anything). And yes I did miss the Explosion Tuesday, and Haste the Day for that matter. Again, too too sick, and I had an overwhelming amount of school work- which is almost all done now!!! I do have Reverend Horton Heat to look forward to on Wednesday. I have tickets and a ride so I'll be damned if I don't make it. Seriously though,they have one of the best live shows I've ever seen. Interesting crowd, very few kids, good opening bands, and a two hour RHH set. It just doesn't get any better than that.
Ok back on topic. I was considering exactly why people get modified. I know there are several reasons; beauty, to remember a certain time in your life, to take control of your body, to do something fun/dangerous, or to reach a higher state of being. I know there are probably other reasons but that's what I have for now. Anyhow, it's this last reason that kind of scares me. Well, maybe not scares me, but at least raises a few questions.
Now, although I only have a few piercings, I have experienced the adrenaline rush that comes with some modifications. It made the experience really fun, and also relatively painless. I wish it had kicked in for my last piercing- for some reason it only kicked in afterwards so the actual piercing was much more painful than it had to be! When I got my nostril and ears done, I barely felt any pain. I felt totally psyched for the rest of the night. I felt the way I do when I see a really awesome concert, or when I'm making some sort of art work that's turning out really well, or when I get a really good idea for an art work or essay, or when I get to do something nice for someone (yes I do get really excited about stuff like this- again, shut up). So, when I get pierced, I can't wait to go and do it again. Seeing as I have a moderate cash flow now, I'll probably be able to get pierced again once this one heals- and the more I think about it the more I like this idea. Even thinking about it now makes me really excited to do it- I really can't wait til my septum's healed.
Anyhow, about this higher state of being- it could be the adrenaline rush. It's like a natural high, so I'm cool with it. I won't get modifications solely for this reason. It's just sort of like a perk. The higher state of being could also be the feeling of really being one with your body, realizing the potential your body and life have, and exploring primitive cultural practices (some of which I believe are much more advanced and sensible than modern cultural practices).
Now that I'm really thinking this out I don't think I really have a problem with it. I was sort of considering the possibility that some people might seek modifications in order to fill a void in their life. Not that I'm singling out modifications as evidence of someone having a void in their life, though. I think that everyone has the desire to reach a higher state of being. Religion usually fulfills this desire. I guess it's really a desire to extend beyond your body and the physical world. It might be a part of realizing your own mortality, and knowing that there has to be more than what you see and touch.
I guess I was considering that some people get modifications with the intention of getting rid of the void in their life and maybe also as a way to fulfill themselves without committing to a religion. Not that there would be anything wrong with doing so, but, again, I don't think that's what I want to do. So that issue is pretty much covered for me. Maybe I should just consider why I want to get modified, not why other people do. I was really concerned about the kind of culture I would be committing myself to if I were to get permanent modifications, but I guess that having tattoos doesn't necessarily make you part of the culture. I know I will very carefully consider any modification I get- permanent or not- so I don't really have to worry about doing something stupid.
I was also thinking that I might not like whatever tattoos I get once I start to get older. I have to consider though that I am a rather strange person. I don't know if I'd qualify as eccentric, but I do have a very odd way of looking at the world. So even if I do end up being a soccer mom or what not, I'll still be me. I still have more to consider about this topic, but now I'm not nearly as confused as I was when I started this.



and here's a pic of Reverend Horton Heat